"bboying is a celebration of life" - profowon.
In terms of bboying,
I now have a aim
I will work towards it.
I duno why, its random, but it just came.
No idea where this will lead to.
Let's see if i achieve it.
Blocks is killing me, so much that i dont even wish to talk about it.
- Late at night, sky's so dark, yet there's still a Star shining bright.
Had a talk with Mrs Chua today.
Thanks, ur Awesome. Your understanding is the type of encouragement and motivation i need.
I will work hard to prove myself, definitely.
And for You, Cheer Up k =)
Problems be it big or small, believe that there will be friends who will always be there for you, and u bet u can count on me too. You should stop keeping everything to urself or u might jus burst and explode one day. Sometimes saying it out will make u feel slightly better, or jus crying it off too perhaps. Wadeva it is, stay positive =) yeah! haha.
Everything is going against me.
Crap.
crap.
crap.
Yes indeed.
Be it people or things,
This sort of feeling
that was never supposed to be.
- Mood:Emptiness
Siao already, lots of things man.
Dance camp, Dance night, txy internal camp ( with major screws happening ) zzz
wad is this =.=
Fail! dam lol, k i need to redeem myself.
I wanna improve!!
I wan new sets, i wan better self performance!
I gota drill, already started abit, but theres much more to improve.
I have still yet to overcome the biggest opponent which is myself, and how to deal with reactions and impromptu-ness in case of a blank mind.
Oh well, theres lot to work on!
Fuyo intersch! Cmon we can do it! haha.
My feet are infected and it is hell of a disgusting sight.
I freaked out myself.
But the most important thing is that i wouldnt be able to rlly do anything for the nxt few days, including dance! =.= That would be so so boring lol.
Oh well...
Tomorrow is monday, i promised myself i will start, i hope i rlly do.
I gota make a change, make that change! Oh well...
Im currently looking forward to natasha bboy nite out jam on the 26th!
Free advertisement:
Lemme introduce u to-
Michael LupLup! ahaha
Ive got my very first pair of running shoes! Asics.
Now its time to do wad i got to do lol, determination is the key to sucess ahahha.
shitz man,
I got injured while trying to learn flare, now my thigh pain like mad =.=
Lol, i cant do it! Or can i? haha... keep on trying man.
Omgomgomg haha i keep thinking of fuyo!!!
Lets do this man, need to do more drills, create more sets and of course routines.
I lack time, lots of time, and money lol!
- Chill, relax, smile, u can do it =P Im here yeah!
Well boring days.
Attending remedials like practically everyday.
And oh i need to study real badly, catching up on this year's and also nxt year.
Someone save me pls... i need all the help i can get man
I have very severe consequences to face if i dun meet the target of all pass for BT1- meaning all Es at least.
Siao siao siao siao!
Dance!!! Im motivated!!
Breakin breakin breakin breakin! =P
Yeah yeah, its time to chiong man! O well, i rlly cant get powers... but i will not stop trying.
Fuyo intersch 2010 coming up in around 2mths time!! ahahaha
A chance to rep for the school! We can do it!!
Training!!
Im determined to train myself up!
Must get my running shoes!! argh!!
whatever u call it. The light has appeared, so has the glimpse of hope.
Enough of past nonsense.
This is the end of it.
------
New Start:
Fos Inter-ct: 09a11 Champs =P
Yep, we won champs.
Our class was totally good, great teamwork, great game.
Props to them.
Charlotte's ankle got injured, get well soon!! You can do it!
My left leg is gg-ed, cant even walk, luplup knee-ed my thigh when we did a teamkill jumping for the same ball together.
My specs was sent flying, and it scratched my face, but phew... No injuries on face, i have a phobia from that bball experience liao.
Bboy training was not good, i was shag ttm.
Leg injury, cant bend, and body was weak, so dint really benefit much.
When my leg recovers, which is soon, my drilling will begin.
I dun like school anymore..
not after what i know im gonna face,
not after that 3 words mrschua said to me.
Those 3 words that constantly rings inside me
evoking this sense of loss, this sense of i duno wad ...
and it constantly forces me to pull myself away from reality.
Im lost, lost in this neverending darkness whereby i do not see any light at all
Life's like that, i need to admit it, but it just seems so surreal.
Speechless is how i would describe it, and escaping is how i am facing it
I know this wont last, it never will, one fine day i will have to step out of this mess
Frankly, Im not really escaping, not attempting either,
i just do not have any follow up plans,
nor do i have any idea of what my decision would be
Ive let many people down, peers, buddies, families etc.
Apologies at this instant wouldnt be of the least bit of help at all.
This is how i feel, feel for now, and i do hope things will change for the better.
This marks the point of reflection.
I haven been blogging for quite some time,
so on a lighter note, out of this total darkness, there was instances of flashes,
flashes that serves as a form of distraction, distraction from all the stuffs which i put to face next week.
Flashes:
Project X- Last for One
Watching a dope performance, Having a good laugh
Meet the cast session, taking photos with the bboys
This is how i pass my days, and how something interesting lights up my life out of the blue.
Nothing interest me anymore, all im left with now is Dance.
Dance to express, Dance to de-stress...
Flunk every single thing.
Yes FLUNKED. =.=
Im Dumb. I AM.
- I really want to make it...
-------------------------
Uncertainty |
| by Heather Gustafson |
| Feelings of confusion, Depression, Uncertainty. Where do I belong? Where do I go? What do I do? Pick up the phone. No one to call. What would I say? Get in the car. No where to go. No one to see. Deep inside Is the urge to scream. At what? Trapped. No escape. Have the need, The desire, The want, For release - For freedom. |
----------------------------------------
But can i ? -
Everything im going through now is crap.
My brain is not working, its dead.
I cant memorize stuff, even if i understand.
Theres hope, but theres also an overpowering sense of helplessness.
I really duno wad to do.
When i think of all the wonderful stuffs i can do after promos, which includes breaking,breaking and more breaking, I feel the thrill and energy inside me. Dance is with me all the time, yet i've been neglecting it for a crucial purpose which isnt turning out right either. Nth is right. Im just a person full of regrets. I know that i have many things at stake, and everything now is a gamble, a gamble of my life and future. Ppl say its 1 week to promos, think of it, its 2 weeks to end of promos. Its 2 weeks to freedom, or maybe not. This is double, triple, quadruple etc the stress. And this pressure is exhausting.
For Lup, life is f up, i do agree on that, but its always good to share ur troubles.
Like wad are friends for, if u think ur rlly the remedy of ur own problems, wadeva u say, so be it.
For Siah, im rlly sry dat u still will have to take ur promos, but we'll all be here for u
Friendship is something which one cannot forgo, and only ppl who understand this will understand wad is true friendship
For Kang, thx alot buddy for all the help u've been giving me, giving me extra notes, reminding me of work and such.
Towards whether i can prove that all this help is worth it, i rlly have nth to say. nth at all.
There are much more elements to this heap of misery.
Studies is just a mere factor, what about the surroundings, what about the people?
I wish to speak no further lol.
" Life is f-up ", Definitely it is.
- This is the so called New Media, a platform for me to express myself. LMAO
alot happened recently
zzzz
its only 1 more week... madness
I rlly got not enough time
i feel dam skeptical
can i promote ...
Should have ponned blocks man, totally jus pulled my grades down
People need lesser marks for promos to promote
i need much more cos i flunked blocks.
and i guess im gona flunk promos too? i duno
but i do noe i cant afford to do dat
Howwwwww........
- Mood:
stressed
- " Be brave, stay strong, cos we're here for u "
Treasure the importance of friendship, true friends will always be there to help u out no matter wad.
U can count on me, u can count on us. Always. -
Today's MAF, well i dun really noe wad to comment on it lol. Supposedly to enjoy performance and such, but as expected we jus danced almost all the while. Met up with the j1s for a small session in classroom, everyone crash like crap lol.
Somehow rua was open so yep, of cos took advantage of it, had a cypher with the seniors.
I have no sets left, all gone, standard also deproved, everything dropped. SIGH...
Lol, sw dat dope kid, powermove combo set sia. Nice one~
OAC was like selling balloons and there was this transparent round one with the heart inside.
It looked quite nice haha, and meaningful isnt it.
1 nice balloon along with 4 roses, dope!
haha, i jus found out yellow rose= reject, i dun care hahaha in my definition yellow rose = cheerful lol!
The night was then complete with lots n lots of smiles which made my day, totally haha.
Came the angel, Warmth seeps in. -
Past few days has been really tiring.
I dunno how to make myself study efficiently, how to make things work.
I read, i do, but nothing goes in. Something somewhere is just wrong.
Time is so limited. Im pressed for it. I want more time...
Anyway, I watched the movie "9"
Oh my, its awesome!
Its not a very long film but its definitely worth it.
Overall its v good, characters are unique, storyline is good, narration is good etc.
Graphics is ownage to the max. Best animated one so far, wonder how long they spent on it.
I freaking pulled my leg muscle today in the midst of my sleep... Wth
I miss dance! I miss u!!
Sorry to keep you waiting.
Sigh epic fail sia.
That passion for dance that's innate just seem to be so magnificent that it's uncontrollable haha.
Read abit then i feel the need to move le, its like part of a routine lol.
But i do not really think that it's a bad thing, it keeps me in check, definitely.
At least i am able to control myself in the sense that i know my limits and when to stop.
Oh finally met up with cec after a long long time haha. Sorry bro.
And also good luck for ur Uni man haha.
Yep after that was casuarina for dinner with their qiang memorizing skills. ( imba )
Gota do geog tmr and send to lup, or he'll probably hound me lmao.
Right now, im watching the loveliest in dreamland =P
ok haha, yes this is my blog! lol at last right.
Today has been a long day.
I love the company yep.
I have to say that dance is really like my life.
It keeps me going. Totally.
New moves keep popping out in my mind on random occasions, but i havent got time to try it out and poof its gone lol!
Breaking today with sw was neat, haha something new always formulates whenever hes around. bboy sworn yeah ~
Promos.. damit, ive got not enough time ahhhhhh!
Im trying yep i am.
But i seem to be taking a rather wrong approach hmmm, i gota make use of this limited time.
-
- Mood:
exhausted
